Friday, April 26, 2013

PAIN AND GAIN (D+)


Bottom Line: Save for the absence of giant, transforming robots, Director Michael Bay’s latest remains a voraciously loud, overstuffed and obnoxiously paced piece of heist genre filmmaking that’s only minimally saved by the onscreen chemistry of Wahlberg, Johnson and Mackie.  They’re clearly working hard and having a blast while every scene, every action, everything around them is either drenched in recycled camera shots (Bay’s an old dog using the same old tricks), crushed beneath the weight of a misguided, laborious and  misogynistic script or spiraling pointlessly out of control as the proceedings become dauntingly less funny.  The movie does wallow in a goofily Three Stooges-like state of bumbling, steroid-infused, dark comedy – and the crowd I was with seemed to positively engage every 17 minutes or so…except now that doesn’t really seem like a positive.  Push the minor plus signs aside and your left with a drab looking, dull and ultimately taxing 134 minutes where you’ll endure quite a bit pain with almost nothing left to gain.  Not unlike Bay’s giant, transforming robot movies…this one, too, is less than meets the eye.

Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Dwayne Johnson, Anthony Mackie, Tony Shalhoub and Ed Harris
Directed by: Michael Bay (BAD BOYS 1-2, TRANSFORMERS 1-3, ARMAGEDDON, THE ROCK and PEARL HARBOR)
Rated: R
Running time: 134 minutes
Story: Based on the unbelievable true story of a group of personal trainers in 1990s Miami who, in pursuit of the American Dream, get caught up in a criminal enterprise that goes horribly wrong. (c) Paramount Studios


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