Wednesday, February 13, 2013


Bottom Line: Cinematically speaking, I couldn’t be more upset right now – ‘cause I was the wrong guy in the wrong place at the wrong time – when I sat down thinking I was about to enjoy a DIE HARD movie.  To varying degrees, I’m a huge fan of all four of the previous installments – love the characters, love the set-ups, love the action, love the vibe.  This fifth movie – sucks hard.  When I see Bruce Willis in a DIE HARD movie I want an authority defying, do-it-yourself, wisecracking, street smart cowboy who happens to be a reluctant tough guy – in this ill thought out iteration, Detective John McClane is an over-the-hill, underused underdog in an uninteresting, uninspired and underwhelmingly generic, live-action cartoon.  It’s actually quite evident that this new, hack-happy, bargain basement director consumed far too many Road Runner cartoons and very little in the way of actual DIE HARD movies while growing his ‘craft’.  ‘It starred Bruce Willis’, ‘there was action’ and ‘the words ‘Die’ and ‘Hard’ are in the title’ are the only three forms of faint praise I can muster if ever I were to discouragingly recommend this to anyone…  A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD is clumsy, obnoxious and narratively dull – it’s mindless entertainment (not always a bad thing – but here, mostly yes) and might be worth your dough if all you’re looking for is a movie starring Bruce Willis, with action and the words ‘Die’ and ‘Hard’ in the title.  It lacks almost every last ounce of heart, spirit, wit and soul of its far superior predecessors and numbs the mind as well as the butt.  Packed with ridiculous action and little else, today would actually be a GREAT day for all future installments of this series to indeed DIE HARD.

Starring: Bruce Willis, Jai Courtney, Yuliya Snigir and Sebastian Koch
Directed by: John Moore (BEHIND ENEMY LINES, THE OMEN and MAX PAYNE)
Rated: R
Running time: 97 minutes
Story: John McClane travels to Russia to help out his seemingly wayward son, Jack, only to discover that Jack is a CIA operative working to prevent a nuclear-weapons heist, causing the father and son to team up against underworld forces.


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